‘No banjos til you drink your tequila!’
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‘Starting to think toast is a self-replicating virus.’
‘You know what they say: deck in, frog out!’
‘If I was a ghost I would definitely comment on people’s towels.’
‘I realize everything.’
‘Oven windows are the greatest inventions since quiche. And vice versa.’
‘If you are doomed to die, you don’t get any cheese.’
‘Finally! A yoga-safe hearing aid!’
‘Audioly… it’s like ravioli only you put it in your ear.’
‘I’ve heard of bathtub gin but never bathtub broccoli.’
‘I think the Higgs boson particles in the wireless router were getting a little red in the face.’
‘Rice and beans are like matter and anti-matter in the same dish.’
‘If you think getting the orange powder from Cheetos on your fingers is bad, wait until you see what time dilation does.’
‘So, when you eat a black hole, you should start at the center, and not at the event horizon.’
‘I literally haven’t looked up the definition of hyperbole in, like, a million years.’
‘It was disconcerting. One of those moments where you walk into the room, see a cow in your bathtub, and think, “Right. So there’s that.” and walk back out.’
‘You know waffles bring out the pirate in me!’
‘It’s hard to breathe in infrared.’
‘You really don’t want a remote control with a digestive system.’
‘You know what item I refuse to touch? Bathroom spoons.’