‘Every mammoth deserves to feel pretty.’
‘Ever try to put a mask on a horse?’ – ‘Only on Batman Day.’
‘The InstaGoths were a tribe like the VisiGoths but they turned up very suddenly.’
‘Nothing ever has anything to do with real life.’
‘Scallops wait for no man.’
‘In my world, ALL hats are made of balloon animals.’
‘To be fair, most people can’t use their butts to pull things out of the oven.’
‘Croutons have no sense of humor.’
‘But what if the Queen stops by and I’ve got my face in a bowl of melted butter?!’
‘I don’t think anyone would be opposed to fudge expansion.’
‘Olive oil tends to give me amnesia.’
‘It just explains why they lost track of their pants when they went to the other side of Mars.’
‘Even brain surgery is easier when you’re a professional chef!’
‘Did you go to the JubJub School of Laying Down?’
‘This horned helmet just SCREAMS ‘skilled electrician’!’
‘T-Rex will never know the joy of putting olives on the end of his claws.’
‘Since the angels got out of the bathroom they’ve been very crunchy.’
‘Everything with you revolves around opposable thumbs.’
‘My call of the wild went to voice mail.’
‘Your office space is NOT Feng Shui if none of your pens have caps!’