‘But if the servers are down, who is going to bring us the waffles?’
‘And what IS a supercollider, anyway, but a giant spoon?’
‘Black schnauzers don’t know how to use digital cameras.’
‘Cheese is not the plural of Chi.’
‘You make everything all neat and then somebody comes along and eats your stalagmites.’
‘They just hired me to dress for the shoot and gave me a burger and a garden hose.’
‘Small, red-snouted mice don’t carry lasers.’
‘You’re two cupcakes behind me – share how that makes you feel.’
‘What does 4 megapixel water taste like?’
‘It’s not always the smart people who control the cheese.’
‘Unbalancing the universe is not an excuse to make pancakes.’
‘You didn’t know your soup was missing a dimension?’
‘I’m pretty sure the chicken would clog your shower head.’
‘I have a hat over my head; I’m pretty sure that’s not psychological.’
‘My new year’s resolution was for no more home surgeries.’
‘I experiment with medieval European root vegetables.’
‘How often does curried goat come up in conversation?’
‘It’s like petting the dog, but more purple.’
‘You can’t put lasagna on a trading card. ‘
‘I heard Donald Trump is really just a bunch of cats taped together.’