‘No, mayonnaise has a horrible power to weight ratio.’
‘Fruit juice does not give you the right to be evil.’
‘So what should Wyoming do? They’re sagging!’
‘I’ve always considered broccoli to be a terrorist act.’
‘I’m talking about people who walk around all day with migraines so bad they have to stay in bed.’
‘I have this vendetta about disallowing vegetables.’
‘She’s always been so sudden.’
‘I don’t know about other people but I spin clockwise.’
‘Justice has little or nothing to do with a disobedient whale.’
‘Marshmallow is the only stable force in the universe.’
‘If you find yourself soaking in warm ketchup, you’ll know you’ve done something wrong.’
‘You don’t get to see that far up a cat’s nose very often.’
‘But then, even the bravest of men may want his willy in the afterlife.’
‘If we could only get excited about canned meat, life would be easy.’
‘People really knew how to fall down in those days.’
‘Old propane tanks: they’re not good eatin.’
‘Iron monkey wasn’t having cows in it.’
‘Mercury retrograde is 67 octane.’
‘I’ve always wanted to date a sarcophagus.’
‘It’s like having two kids, when every morning is Christmas morning, and they communicate with ritual drumming.’